There are times when you look back at your life and don’t recognize yourself doing all those things which you once did..
We always want what is not in our hands. And if by life’s grace we get what we want, we just find something new to long for. Reflecting on life – I have done a lot of this subconsciously and I have had a lot of realizations but I have to honestly accept that they have not yet sunk in or rather the skewed human mind doesn’t allow the sink in process. You know that this is how things are and will be, yet the human nature does not accept it. Acceptance is a big deal – Acceptance of everything, the past, the present and the future. I never gave it a second thought before. Now that I know how important it is and how many problems it will solve, I want to embrace it. I try every single day. When I get up in the morning, I tell myself “Accept life! It has never failed you, though you might have misunderstood that it had during some tough times.” It is just harder than it sounds but I intend to keep trying. Also, the flashes of nostalgia about one’s life so far gives a very different perspective of how things are and how things should be.
There was a time when I had nothing but tears and fear in my heart about Hyderabad. There was a time when I got used to the city and whiled away the time in neutrality.
There was a time when I wanted nothing else in my life than to get out of the city.
Then there was a time when I started to think that the Hyderabad episode was not that bad.
Then there came a time when I realized that I had an awesome life there and just that I didn’t realize it back then.
There was a time when my first company seemed so special.
There was a time when I didn’t care about it.
There was a time when I started thinking that I am getting nothing out of it and wanted to just get out.
Then there came a time when I realized how much the company has shaped up my life even beyond my career and today I tell people I was treated like a queen back then.
There was a time when I entered my new company with excitement.
This is the time when the excitement has turned into fear because I have to meet up with a lot of expectations.
And I know there will come a time when I look back and laugh at myself for having feared about such things.
I wrote the these lines just to come back here in future and check how I feel about them! I have seen myself and many other people always just reaching out for the next step. It is fine as long as we take a moment to be thankful for where we are now. Every person’s life, if written down, will start somewhere and will end at a place which is nothing like the starting point. Sometimes, I find myself wanting to be in that comfort zone without getting out because of insecurities. I know it is not right. So, I chide myself and move on. This post is for the people who think they have achieved nothing so far and feel insecure. Think back on your “Once upon a time” moments and you will know how far you have come. It is good to think back as long as you remember that there is a tomorrow that you cannot avoid 😉