Ripples of my Reflections

I think, therefore I write

Page 16 of 66

A mindless ritual

Image Source: Pinterest

Image Source: Pinterest

So many reasons to give up, but
She chooses to stay every time.
All the while she fears, oh, how she fears,
The inevitable fear that the moment,
When the reasons to stay will tempt her,
To give up, to say, enough is enough.

A smile, a kiss, a brush of hair,
To remind her of what they once were.
A hand to help, a shoulder to cry on,
To show that life cannot leech out love.
It’s not fair to have had so much
Yet, there’s so little left now.

Over & over, the cycle goes on,
As if in repeat mode, pain, loneliness, fear
Replaced by hope, faith and belief.
As a circle that never ends.
As a path that never goes anywhere.
A mindless ritual for the soul!

Until later πŸ™‚

Name it what you will

I started this blog quite a few years back and blogging back then was about writing what you feel. That’s it. There were no expectations of you-scratch-my-back-and-I-will-scratch-yours. There was reciprocity, of course. But it never got in the way of us writing realistic posts and reading other posts and responding honestly. This world has evolved so much with the years and I am all for a positive change. But the culture that I see in this space now doesn’t look like my cup of cold coffee. Yeah, maybe it is not just the world of blogging changed, maybe I changed too. Maybe my perceptions changed too.

However, what bothers me more is the very same people who wrote brilliant posts are churning out the commercial rubbish, campaigning for brands that they had to google out to find what they stood for. I confess that I tried a couple of such posts and that is the worst thing I have ever done with respect to writing and I will never do it again. Not for a million dollars. If I want to make money out of writing, I’d publish a book or open a fully dedicated and commercial blog. I wouldn’t do this laying in commercial posts amidst personal stuff, thereby luring in your trusting readers to read the campaigns. And the height of all this is we don’t see that this is all just marketing strategy and the typical greed of making that extra few bucks is working out very well for the brand companies.

Also, have you noticed the topics that they choose for you to write? It is all hot topics which would make people go gaga over them. Like feminism. How many unrelated brands have beaten this same snake to death and we keep biting the bait. Or maybe we don’t care about it as long as we get traffic to our blog. Also, there are people who keep writing about how happy they are with their life, home, marraige, kids etc. every single month. I mean, why would you need to give a status update about your life on the internet. And to my dismay I found out that they are doing this charade to get back at their “enemies” and show themselves up in front of everyone. Sharing something about yourself is okay, but this? Get a life, please. That is one of the reasons why I stopped following and participating in the Action Replay theme where you talk about how your month was.

Anyway, where am I going with all this? Due to many factors, including me changing, I don’t recognize the friendship that I once formed anymore. I am still game for reading blogs that are worth it. I may or may not read, I may or may not comment, but you wouldn’t bother about it if you are writing for the right reason. Words, when put right, never fade away.

I have thought a lot about this even before but never got around to doing it because of the love I have for writing. But now I realize, I have been doing a great injustice in chugging on just to fit in, just to keep going as I used to. So I took a break for a few months from blogging, cleared my head, drew inspiration from like-minded bloggers and took a snap decision. I unpublished my blog page of Facebook and disabled comments on the site. That way, the only thing that will motivate me to write here as and when I want to, is the urge to write about something.

Until later πŸ™‚

P.S: Thanks to Adit for getting me back on my feet and my inspiration. I know I am not quite there yet, but I will get there eventually.

Buying a flat – Demystifying the experience

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Image Source:indianpropertylawyers.com

Who doesn’t have the desire to own a home? Everyone desires a place that they can call it their own, be it lavish or utilitarian, splashed with aesthetics or a low-key utilitarian. I am no different. I have always wanted a place of my own. I very well knew that I would end up taking a hefty loan and the place wouldn’t really be “mine” till I pay off the loan. But this is an illusional world we live in. We are provided with EMIs which make us indebted on the stake of money which we are yet to earn. Anyway, I digress. I followed the world and clinched my desire by booking a flat. I had very little prior experience with respect to all this real estate, flat construction but there has to be a first time for everything. I started my learning process with this positive thought.

As much as I love our new place, decorating it up, settling in, relishing that I have reached my dream, there are certain ugly truths that I need to face and that’s what nudged me to write this post. In this process of getting it constructed and moving in, we have shed tears, blood, sweat and what not. There are certain dirty clauses that lay hidden in that construction, sale agreements that you sign with nothing more than a skim-read. Behind all those flattering words and smiles, there are certain cunning layers to that marketing guy trying hard to make you book a flat with his firm. There is a certain table left to be turned once you cross that threshold from being a prospective buyer to a trapped customer.

Here are some samples for you to ponder on:

1. Ever wondered how the director of the constructions firm is coming down to meet you just because you wanted to clear some doubts before you hand over that cheque? You might have even wondered whether you commanded that kind of a respect. I request you to stop right there and throw away that narcisstic thought. It is the cheque you might hand over afterwards that commands the respect, not you. Never you. Yes, there’s only a 50% chance that you might book the flat even after you get your discussions done, but that 50% chance is one that’s worth taking for them. If you don’t believe me, wait till you pay up almost 80-90% of the cost as the building progress and see how they behave when you want the interiors finished soon for the rest 10% of the cost. You will see quite a personality change!

2. Possession in xx months – the xx will vary depending on what state of construction the building is in. The maximum quote for a normal apartment at the initial stages of construction would be 14 months + 3 months of grace period. When they say this, stop them right there and read the sale-construction agreement again. There will be a clause that will save their asses from fire when they go beyond the grace period. All possible reasons will be cited such as materials unavailability or labour unavailability. This clause will be used as an excuse again and again till your ears bleed.
If you are smart enough to get a rental penalty clause inserted,(Many builders safely do not insert this clause, assuming we are that dumb. Not to blame them, some of us are.) then miraculously all their labour and material problems will be solved in a minute and your flat will be hurriedly made into a ready condition – one that is just enought to move in, leaving you to wonder about the quality of the work when done in such a hurry. Needless to mention, there will be an aftermath of such hurry where you have to deal with new problem every day. A new day and a new problem, Yay!

3. Quality – Shortly said, when you book the flat, you will promised out of the world quality, but you will get quality which will really make you want to go out of this world. Only way to get this right is to follow up like an obsessed maniac and look at the materials used, read up on internet and so on. You will become a civil engineer short of the educational degree.

4. “We will be completing this task in another ten days” – The most infamous phrase used by the builders. Never trust this excuse. The ten days will span across weeks, months and even over an year. If I had given my rental notice to vacate on the date promised to me, I would have been living on the roads. Do your planning and keep a buffer of minimum 1-2 months.

5. Amenities – This is a huge looting booth for the constructors. The amenities promised and the ones delivered hardly match up. For example, you will be promised a world-class roof-top swimming pool and you will be provided with a bath tub sized one which is too small that it can’t even be called a baby pool. Also,the amenities will not be constructed in the promised time frame but will be in progress even a year after you move in, however, we will expected to cough up the cost of the flat, inclusive of amenities, the moment you move in.

The list goes on…They say that there are good constructors who don’t loot us. I am yet to come across one. I agree that I only talk of the experience of closely witnessing a couple of flats getting constructed in the family and then getting my flat constructed. But believe me when I say, getting one flat constructed will give you enough picture about this. So what should we do about this?

For one, don’t believe a word they tell you when you are a prospective customer. Do your research. In spite of your diligence, there will be mess-ups and that’s life. But the more you do your research, the less ignorant you will be of the scams pulled on you. Before you book a flat, make sure you have the time and energy to closely follow up with the project. Be prepared to make that project your life for that span of time. You will have to think about it literally every waking moment and sometimes in your dreams too. I had many a reminders about things to be done for my place in my dreams. I also spent many sleepless nights pondering over lists to go through, check boxes to be ticked, things to buy and so many other things.

In spite of all this, don’t get shooed away from the dream of owning a place, if that’s what you want. Don’t get pushed into it by the societal pressure that you must own a place once you are at a certain age or stage in your life. If you wantΒ to own a place, venture into it well-prepared, armed with some prior research, some know-hows and a lot of energy. You will have a life experience that will teach you many things that you wouldn’t have dreamed of.

Until later πŸ™‚

Quote Challenge: 3/3

if-you-love-sombody-let-them-go

Image Source: soulmatequotes.com

This quote resonates with a life lesson I never thought I needed but I was wrong, but all that is done and dusted now. But the essence of this quote defined and still defines a major life decision and I carry the lesson with gratitude. There is just one too many things when it comes to love, but often we forget to stop and see if something was ours to begin with. If it was indeed, nothing in the world can take you apart. But if it is not, well.. we’d learn to live without it eventually, if not immediately. I am just happy he was mine all along and I was his all along. So many things happened to conspire against us but like it goes, the universe conspired to bring us together. And today, we live as the solid proof with 23 years of acquaintanceship, almost 12 years of a romantic relationship and nearing 2 years as husband and wife.

This quote challenge has been fun for me, I hope it is the same for the writers I tagged. In fact, I had too many quotes shortlisted and picking just 3 was a quite a task.

Today, I tag:

  1. Shailaja @ The Moving Quill
  2. Aathira @ Bewitched by words
  3. Nisha @ Teeth that sparkle

What is the 3-Day Quote Challenge about?

1. Post one of your favorite quotes on three consecutive days. The quote can be from your favorite book, author, or your own. (You must post 3 different quotes in all)
2. Nominate 3 bloggers each day to challenge them.
3. Thank the blogger, who nominated you.

Until later πŸ™‚

Quote Challenge: 2/3

I had scheduled this post for yesterday and another for today since I would be busy with Varalakshmi Vratham celebrations at home but wordpress scheduler just got knackered and didn’t post them. So here goes..

~Courage is not the absence of fear, it is going ahead in spite of it ~ Author unknown

I read this on a calendar when I was 12 and the quote has stuck with me ever since. Whenever I was hesitant about trying out something, this quote reminded me to just go ahead. I would take the plunge before I could change my mind and it has only resulted in good. So this has come to be the motto of my life many a time.

For today, I tag the following bloggers:

  1. The other side of me
  2. The girl next door
  3. Shantala

I am loving this, thanks to Leo for tagging me on this one.

What is the 3-Day Quote Challenge about?

1. Post one of your favorite quotes on three consecutive days. The quote can be from your favorite book, author, or your own. (You must post 3 different quotes in all)
2. Nominate 3 bloggers each day to challenge them.
3. Thank the blogger, who nominated you.

Until later πŸ™‚

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