I think, therefore I write


If there is one thing which is messed up beyond repair, it is the human mind. And we somehow manage to mess it up even more. So here goes the story of my mind giving me a hard time. To give you a preview of the show, I must tell you this – My mind thinks too much and all in the wrong direction. It will come up with the weirdest of all interpretations for anything, will get bummed up for no reason, will torture me with its pointless frustrations when I really have some useful job to do. So now you know that I am totally unable to control my mind. That’s enough preview. πŸ˜‰

So, here comes. Up until recently, I cannot visualize things at will. For instance, when I go for shopping I would be totally unable to try to visualize the kurti I am holding in my hand against my jean in my cupboard back home. Color against color match or mismatch? No. Trying to visualize the design pattern? No. And hence I never shopped without a companion who excells in such stuff and they would do the mental movie playing part and give their approvals or otherwise. Then out of the blue, I found during my last shopping spree that my mind is able to do that . Not always. But flashes of it. More like, it does that when it really likes a dress I am considering to buy. But when I try it at will, it gives me a very hard time. The experience would be something like trying to reach something which is just their one minuscule beyond the tip of my fingers but am unable to reach it. 😐

The next thing is, well this requires a sub-preview. You must know that I cannot dance at all. No. Not one step. Not one move. I still remember the day when I had to (read was forced to) do at least one dance move during the Industrial Visit trip in college and I made a complete fool of myself being unable to 😳 . Moving on, people have told me to just let go and dance even if it is clumsy. I have got this advice a lot. Believe you me, I try. I have wanted to dance at such times. But no. There is absolutely zero body-mind co-ordination. So I came to terms with the fact that I cannot dance [Hoping that there will never come a time where I am held at gun point and asked to dance]. *Preview Over* (Enough πŸ™„ , move on)

Recently, when I hear peppy numbers, my mind starts to dance, if I may phrase it that way. Remember it is the mind and not me. It is as if there is another me inside which is doing the dancing part. No, I am not just visualizing someone/myself dancing, instead I feel my mind doing the dance. When I try to catch hold of what it is doing, it is as slippery as an eel. If I try and do it again on purpose, there are flashes but never the whole picture. It drains me. It is like learning Occlumency from Snape. 😯 The crazier thing is my mind is so far able to do its awesome dance only for peppy numbers. [I am not exaggerating when I say awesome, yesterday it did a superb choreography for “Everybody tells me” from “Another Cinderella story”. That’s gotta be something.] So when I am listening to melodies, or songs which have lyrics depicting the situations, my mind tries to do something and obviously fails. And I have to go through the ordeal of watching the clumsy attempts which leaves me more drained. 😐

Now tell me, isn’t my mind the best place to be? 😈 In case you are Sheldon Cooper and didn’t get it, that was sarcasm for you! Re-read the title of this post. I should be removing that (ly) right? Well, I am not gonna πŸ˜›

What do you say? Alter-ego? Might be, for who knows!

Until later πŸ™‚


  1. Visha

    First things first.
    The smileys. Looks like someone is having fun here πŸ˜€
    And Sheldon Cooper. Sigh. How I love that character.

    Moving on the post now πŸ˜› , I am going to give a pinch and say “Same Pinch”. I have choreographed innumerable songs in my head, but when it comes to actual dance, I can not replicate for the life of me πŸ™„

    But I play match top-match jeans quite well πŸ˜› Just that I am unable to do the same for bangles, I always forget which color I need πŸ˜₯

    • Keirthana

      Well, all thanks to you Visha! I love emoticons but have figured out how to bring those on screen beyond the normal smiling and frowning face πŸ˜€ But now, well you can see the result πŸ˜›

      Wow, I never thought there would be another person who has the same min-dance syndrome. At least you got the top-jean matching part, for me everything has to be shown in material. πŸ˜•

  2. Ajay Konthamβ„’

    The mind deceives the reality.

    You have no idea how great of a dancer I am in my mind. But in real world when I give myself a try, I wonder why its’ not even 0.00000001% of what my mind was processing about the dance moves.

    Well, You just Bazinga-ed us. πŸ˜›

    Hmm, Alter Ego! You could say that.

    • Keirthana

      You said it! How deep the deception goes is for each of us to experience on a case to case basis.

      So you are also in the club πŸ˜€ Glad!

      • Ajay Konthamβ„’

        Yeah, as far as I can remember.
        Come on, who can ever miss that Club. πŸ˜€

  3. Uma

    Done the tag, Keirthana πŸ™‚

  4. Raghavan alias Saravanan M

    Sabba.. enna solla varra nee ippo? πŸ™‚

    • Keirthana

      Mudila na vitrunga anna πŸ˜› The crux is my mind seems to be wired weirdly and I think you know that already πŸ˜‰

  5. Red Handed

    Ok I am the opposite of you
    LOve dancing…and good at it according to MYSELF πŸ˜›
    and I shop alone because I m someone who can roam for 5 hrs and end up buying nothing
    And your alter ego….uuuuuuu!!! hahaahah

    • Keirthana

      Wow… Good at dancing eh? Lucky you!! And 5 hrs of roaming and nothing? That is really something, Red! πŸ™‚

      Sheldon is adorable, isn’t he? πŸ˜‰

  6. S Jayanth

    You have got the skill to express such messed up train of thoughts. Forgive me for saying ‘messed up’, because I have a mind similar to the one you describe and all I say to my mind is ‘you are soo very messed up’. I just loved the way you could express such annoying, fast flickering thoughts. That is one very tough thing for me. To say the least, it makes me feel like a cripple. I, being a writer, yet cannot spread out my mind’s mess into clean, clear words that others can understand. you do that with a great skill.
    and I too do the choreography in my head! Haha! You must put a sarcasm sign if you want sheldon to get it.haha!
    its been a pleasure visiting and reading this post. it gave me hope that i would someday be able to WRITE MY MESSY MIND IN SIMPLE WORDS THAT OTHERS UNDERSTAND. Thank you for that! πŸ™‚


    • Keirthana

      Wow, thank you very much for that! Don’t apologize, messed up seems to be just about right to describe my mind πŸ™‚ I am glad this post gave you the hope that you too can write about such confusing things. It means a lot to me!

      Thanks for dropping by! Please do come for more πŸ™‚

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